Chapter 3 : Shiny Pudding
8 July 1999: Footloose and fancy free on a slow Thursday, I took the funky chrome to Hayward, Where I saw a listing in the Yellow Pages for a plating service. At Auto Truck and Bumper, A gigantic industrial plant decorated with airbrushed cars, I met Dave Gaitan, the manager, who sized up my crappy chrome at a single glance.
"I can re-chrome it", he said, "but I can't get all the pits out. It'll look shiny, but it won't look new again." Oddly enough, this is the absolutely perfect compromise for me-- a great balance between renovation and benign neglect. Utility, not flash. His approach has a lot to do with the manifold process involved in plating.
For those of you unfamiliar with the re-chroming process it goes like this:
1. Pitted old chrome part is dipped into a vat of poison, which is then shot through with high voltage until all the old chrome melts off. What's left is the crappy pot metal that was underneath the crappy chrome plating.
2. Clean part is then put into another vat of different poisonous stuff, and again zapped, which plates it with a layer of copper.
3. Somebody with a high boredom threshold buffs the copper layer until all the pits and imperfections are smooth, repeating steps 2 and 3 until it's perfect.
4. Part is finally put into another vat of electrified cyanide, and this time it comes out shiny.
One of Clyfford Still's greatest canvases, Untitled (1971) shows the subtle interplay between light and dark that is a recurrent motif in his art. That, or the rust pattern on the left side of the Panel Van.. Since Dave has better things to do with his time (Like insurance collision work and Honest-to-God restoration projects) we agreed he's just going to have steps 1 and 4 done, and maybe a little 3. Fine by me... besides, the trim will look pretty sharp with fresh detail paint.
Hey, I saw his '55 Jimmy outside (and inside the shop he keeps a perfectly restored 1941 Chevy Pickup) and I knew I was in the right place. It's like the deal with Lazlo-- if you involve people who get really excited about old iron, resto work is a real pleasure.
Later that day, I talked to a fellow who operates Economy Cleaners in Sand City--, a small town outside Monterey, CA where the primary industry is sand. It used to service adjoining Fort Ord, but the base closed and now it's just sand. Anyway, his dry-cleaning concern goes back to 1928 and used to have branches all over the state. The logical original owner. He's going to ask his dad. Another old-car fiend, too-- He drives a 1967 El Camino.
11 July 1999: Got a few precious hours with the beast, and I spent them working on the back door latches (so I can lock up the thing) and opening up the door to get at a sticky lock cylinder (no-go, a real rust-fest in there).
Here's Garryowen installing the aftermarket tach, and doing a fine job of it... Garryowen, though, got some real good stuff done: he installed a tachometer on the steering column right below the dash. I'm really used to driving by tach, and it told me that the engine runs about 2800 RPM at 60 MPH. Too high, but not dangerously so. Damn 3.90:1 differential is going to really bother me until I can do something about it. I just know myself.
12 July 1999:Email from Lazlo:
Get the damn Panel over here. Rusty, (Pen's Car), is finally gone*. I finished it before the weekend but the only key got lost and it had to sit here until the key showed up in her Dad's car on Saturday. I'll be here tomorrow, (tonight I gotta get a tent pole....Don't ask...), and Wednesday I can be around if needed. I will not be here this weekend, (Thursday night thru Monday), I will be lecturing evil trout on just why their eeeeeeeevil. I may sacrifice a few to prove my point, but I can start as soon as I return, (this will be quicker than one might think... and I'll make it pretty too!!!) Yes! Let's get the big ol' bastard over here and take wrenches to it!!!!
Weeeeeeeeee!
Lazlo
A shot of the motor, the famous Thriftmaster six-cylinder, found in Chevys from 1929 to 1962. It's not painted-- That what color the block glows after it's been idling for a few minutes. * Pen is Lazlo's girlfiriend, a friend of mine for the last 20-odd years, and I get the feeling we'll be hearing from her sometime about Lazlo's little wrenching hobby : )
Anyway, hot damn.
This is the spare steering gear, just as it was given to me. Note the thick protective layer of 43-year-old gunk. 13 July 1999: Got the van delivered to Lazlo about 9 o'clock at night, after a VERY busy day of making banner ads. It no longer sits on Willowbrook, but rather in a cozy garage in Santa Cruz proper.
Lazlo gave me a ride back to my car and told a number of anecdotes, all very humorous in nature, none of which I can repeat. Except the one about an unfortunate fellow who came to him for (what he thought was) head gasket work. Laz cracked open the mill and discovered one of the pistons missing. That sort of detail kind of sticks with you.
What General Motors wants you to believe the steering gear looks like. From the sales brochure. 15 July 1999: Spent three hours in the garage disassembling old iron. When Debbie gave me the Panel Van, it came with a spare steering gear. I purchased a rebuild kit from Chevy Duty and commenced taking it apart. The steering gear is a combination of the steering wheel mast and a box on the bottom with gears in it, which transmits the rotation to the Pitman arm, which turns the wheels. I have no idea who this Pitman person is, but we all owe him (or her) a debt of gratitude. Without it, we'd all be driving our cars into brick walls.
Great fun. I always enjoyed auto work, especially when it's not a life-or-death situation. I hammered the crap out of it, trying to get the old bushings out. The grease inside the thing was of a type I've never seen-- green, and the exact consistency of pudding. Looked like something you'd buy at a juice bar. Smelled slightly worse, though. The gear utilizes a strange recirculating ball bearing system. Damn things got everywhere!
Notes:1. Ever notice there are no instructions in your owner's manual for how to make the steering wheel work? I mean, it's probably the most important piece of equipment on the dash (certainly the largest) and boom-- you're just assumed you know how it works. Talk about a lawsuit waiting to happen... I had this idea a while back of replacing the steering wheel (a dangerous piece of metal, ready to pierce your sternum in a collision) with a push button. Push once for left, twice for right, three times for sharp left, etc. Any merit?
2. Eileen and pudding: Can't even mention pudding around her. I told her what I named this week's episode and she said, "it's cruel of you to mention pudding when there's none in the house." She says this every time.
